Your first coliving is going to be weird. Good weird, mostly. But there’s a learning curve that nobody talks about because everyone’s too busy posting sunset photos on Instagram.
After hosting 180+ digital nomads and watching them go through the exact same emotional arc, here’s what I wish someone had told me before my first coliving.
Before you arrive
1. Pack half of what you think you need.
Seriously. You’re sharing a house, not moving into one. One week’s worth of clothes, a good pair of headphones, your laptop, and a power strip. That’s it. Every first-timer overpacks. You’ll do laundry. The coliving has towels. You don’t need four pairs of shoes.
2. Arrive on move-in day, not at midnight.
Most colivings have a move-in day when everyone arrives together. Show up on that day, during the day. Arriving at 11pm on a Tuesday when everyone has already bonded is the loneliest feeling in the world. If you can’t arrive on move-in day, arrive during the morning so you have a full day to settle in and meet people.
3. Tell them about dietary needs early.
If you’re vegan, gluten-free, allergic to shellfish — tell the hosts before you arrive. Most colivings do group dinners and they can’t accommodate you if they find out at the dinner table. This isn’t a hotel; they’re cooking for you like family. Help them help you.
4. Download offline maps and get a local SIM card.
Your first day is going to involve navigating a new place, finding the supermarket, figuring out transport. Have Google Maps downloaded offline and a local SIM card ready (or an eSIM — Airalo works great). Don’t be the person asking for WiFi passwords while standing in the rain at the front door.
The first few days
5. Say yes to the first dinner.
Even if you’re tired. Even if you’re an introvert. Even if you just want to unpack and sleep. The first group dinner is where bonds form. Skip it, and you’ll spend the next week catching up socially while everyone else already has inside jokes.
6. Learn everyone’s name on day one.
There will be 10-20 people. You won’t remember all of them. Try anyway. Use the classic trick: repeat their name back when they introduce themselves. “Nice to meet you, Sofia.” Write them down in your phone if you have to. Being called by your name on day two makes people feel welcome, and they’ll return the favor.
7. Don’t hide in your room.
The biggest mistake first-timers make. You retreat to your room to “settle in” and suddenly it’s day three and you haven’t talked to anyone. Force yourself into common areas for the first 48 hours. Sit in the living room with your laptop. Hang out in the kitchen while someone cooks. You don’t have to be the life of the party — just be present.
The emotional arc
Nobody tells you about this, but every coliving stay follows the same emotional pattern:
8. Week 1: Excitement overload.
Everything is new. The people, the place, the routine. You’re saying yes to everything, staying up too late, exploring every corner. It’s exhilarating and exhausting.
9. Week 2: The dip.
The novelty wears off. You realize your room is smaller than you’d like, that one person chews loudly, and that the WiFi drops out during your important call. This is normal. It’s not the coliving’s fault. It’s adjustment.
10. Week 3-4: Belonging.
This is the magic part. You stop being “the new person” and start being part of the house. You have your spot at the dinner table. You know who makes good coffee and who to avoid before 9am. The conversations go deeper. The friendships feel real.
11. The last few days: The Sunday-night blues, amplified.
Leaving a coliving is harder than arriving. You’ve built a little family in a few weeks, and now you’re scattering across the globe. People cry. It’s not dramatic — it’s human. Exchange numbers, make plans to meet at the next chapter, and know that the sadness means you did it right.
Living with people
12. Headphones are your best friend.
Not just for work — for everything. Someone’s watching a show in the common area and you want quiet. Someone’s on a call in the kitchen. Someone plays guitar at 10pm. Noise-canceling headphones solve 80% of coliving friction. Buy the best ones you can afford.
13. Clean up after yourself immediately.
Nothing destroys house vibes faster than a sink full of dishes. Wash your stuff right after you use it. Wipe down the counter. Put your food back in the fridge with your name on it. These aren’t rules — they’re respect.
14. It’s okay to need alone time.
Coliving is social by default, and that’s the point. But even the most extroverted person needs space sometimes. Take a solo walk. Work from a cafe for a morning. Close your door for an afternoon. Nobody will judge you for recharging — and you’ll be better company afterward.
15. The people matter more than the place.
The best coliving experience I’ve ever had was in a mediocre apartment with incredible people. The worst was in a beautiful villa with bad group dynamics. You can’t control who else books, but you can control how you show up: be open, be kind, be genuine. The rest follows.
The honest truth
Coliving isn’t for everyone. If you need total control over your environment, hate compromise, or get annoyed by other people’s habits easily — it’s going to be tough. But if you’re even slightly curious about shared living, give it a try. The discomfort of the first few days gives way to something surprisingly meaningful.
Start with a 2-week stay if a full month feels like too much commitment. Read our guide on what coliving actually is if you want the basics, or browse community-focused colivings to find spaces where the social side is front and center.
The worst that happens? You learn something about yourself. The best? You find your people.